When you read that, what did you think of first? The muscle? The brain? The education? The technical skills?
You may need any of those things for any given achievement. If youre trying to become a pro basketball player, youll need muscle. If youre trying to get a college degree, youll need brain. If you want to become a plumber, youll need education, and if you want to be a lab tech, youll need technical skills.
But theres one thing youll need no matter what youre trying to accomplish, and thats patience.
As Shakespeare said: How poor are they that ha not patience! / What wound did ever heal but by degrees? / Thou knowst we work by wit and not by witchcraft, / And wit depends on dilatory time. [Othello, II:3]
Dilatory means tending or intended to cause delay, and this quality of time or the time it takes to do something worthwhile cant be bent. Whatever youre attempting, it will take as long as it takes. By wit, he means using your head, not relying on witchcraft, magical formulas, or wishful thinking. There is no magic that can make it happen. It takes thought, planning, and determination, and yes, these all require time.
So whatever the task at hand accomplishing something in your career, grieving a loss or death, rearing your children, or forging bonds with a new partner it will take time, and therefore it will take patience.
And heres what is sometimes the hardest part. The word patience comes from the Latin pati to suffer. All the meanings of patience in the dictionary let you know something is going to be required of you that magic cant circumvent:
%26middot;Bearing pains or trials calmly or without complaint
%26middot;Manifesting forbearance under provocation or strain
%26middot;Not hasty or impetuous
%26middot;Steadfast despite opposition, difficult or adversity
%26middot;Able or willing to bear
Patience relies on resilience, an Emotional Intelligence competency, because the definition is full of trials, pains and opposition. Resilience means being able to tolerate loss, setbacks, rejections and adversity and being able to bounce back, without losing your hope and enthusiasm for the future.
Patience is particularly necessary when you are working with other people to accomplish something, which is becoming more the norm all the time. In fact we never really accomplish something alone. It takes patience to convince others, to coordinate efforts, to work out the politics, to forge a team. If you lack Emotional Intelligence, and therefore let your emotions get the better of you, you will give in to the frustration and obstacles. In order to have patience, you must be able to understand and manage your own emotions and those of others, because in every task there are setbacks and challenges, and people can become discouraged.
Patience, pazienza, Geduld, paciencia, la patience in todays multicultural world, we are going to need more and more.
Ask the experienced, not the learned, say the Arabs, because the wit Shakespeare talks about comes with the diligence of time and patience, not just book learning. There are things in every field and every endeavor we can only learn through the patience of time.
You can make haste in beginning what you want to accomplish. It is said that the famous French Marshall Lyautey once asked his gardener to plant a tree. The gardener complained it was a slow-growing tree that wouldnt reach maturity for 100 years. The Marshall allegedly replied, In that case, there is no time to lose. Plant it this afternoon!
Whatever youve set out to accomplish, dont waste any time beginning. But once you have started, remember that it will take patience, which requires wit and not witchcraft. Keep your eye on the goal, keep your head about you, manage your emotions, and be willing to persevere.
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